Winter feels especially challenging now that I have a baby at home. How can I help myself — and my baby — get through the cold, dark days of the season without going crazy?

Kari's answer

"When I go down to the kitchen in the morning, even before I make my one year old his bottle, I light the three taper candles I keep on my dining table. It makes it a little easier to be up in the dark."

Many people struggle with winter. The darkness makes us tired, and the cold can make it feel harder to get outdoors to do things. And once you add a baby or kids into the mix, these things feel even more challenging. The lack of sleep is made worse by late sunrises and early sunsets, going out in the cold necessitates layers upon layers for both you and little ones, and so many of parents’ best go-to activities - like parks and playgrounds - feel inaccessible in winter. And don’t even get me started on the calamity that is daycare cold and flu season. My one-year-old has been home this week with a fever, pink eye, and a little diarrhea sprinkled in just for fun.

I’m Kari Leibowitz, and I’ve become something of a winter expert. In 2014 I moved to Tromsø, Norway — over 250 kilometers north of the Arctic Circle — to conduct psychology research on how people there make it through their sunless winters without getting depressed.

Two years ago I published my first book, How to Winter: Harness Your Mindset to Thrive on Cold, Dark, or Difficult Days (available wherever books are sold in English and Dutch), which combines my experience living in Norway, research on the power of mindset I conducted during my PhD in psychology in the Stanford Mind & Body Lab, and cultural insights from places all over the world that embrace winter.

As a new mom in Amsterdam, here are my top strategies for finding joy and fun during winter’s dark days:

Make it cozy

Amsterdam’s late sunrises and early sunsets can make the night seem to last forever. Rather than fighting this, low lights — think lamps, twinkly lights, and candles — work with the darkness. Ambient lights turn darkness from an annoyance into your background for cozy mornings and evenings.

When I go down to the kitchen in the morning, even before I make my one year old his bottle, I light the three taper candles I keep on my dining table; it makes it a little easier to be up in the dark. Lighting is probably the most important feature of ambiance, but blankets, tea, a nice gentle playlist, and my trusty hot water bottle all help me romanticize gray, rainy days.

Embrace indoor activities

Rather than thinking about winter as the time we’re stuck inside, we can think of winter as the time of year we get the chance to indulge in all of Amsterdam’s indoor offerings.

It’s museum season! From the Rijksmuseum to the Maritime Museum to ARTIS Groote and dozens more, leaning in to winter as the time of year to go hard on indoor museums makes this time of year feel special.

If museums aren’t your thing, make this your season to explore the best baby-friendly cafes, or try to visit a new OBA branch every week until you find your very favorite.

The key here is to seek out these indoor spaces as something special for this time of year, not a last resort. When all else fails, if I’m feeling cranky and so is my baby, I’ll throw him in the bathtub at any time of day. I’ll bring my cup of tea into the bathroom with me and hang out with him while he splashes for an hour. For older kids, I’ve heard that popsicles in the bathtub are always a hit.

Get outside

Okay, I know I just told you to embrace indoor activities, but I think it’s equally important to get outside in the winter. Luckily, most of us are walking, biking, or taking public transport to get around the city, so we have lots of chances to bundle up and enjoy the outdoors. We’ve had a string of beautiful days recently — cold, yes, but clear and crisp and sunny.

Whether it’s a carrier walk, a stroller walk, or a toddle, 10-30 minutes outdoors can really help reset the mood. Research shows that movement, fresh air, and connection with nature are all natural anti-depressants, so getting outside can also be an antidote to the winter blues. My toddler loves to feel the snow and mud with his fingers, to pick up sticks, and to look at the trees. Experiment with bundling up and getting outside on clear winter days, and see how you feel afterwards.

"When we give ourselves the chance to enjoy winter, even as we look forward to warmer, brighter days, we remind ourselves that we can find moments of wonder even in dark times, and that hard seasons come and go."

I hope these strategies will help you find a little bit of extra comfort and joy throughout the rest of winter. When we practice embracing winter — finding the opportunities of the season — we practice leaning in to whatever season we’re in, literally or figuratively. When we give ourselves the chance to enjoy winter, even as we look forward to warmer, brighter days, we remind ourselves we can find moments of wonder even in dark times, and that hard seasons come and go.